Watching a pre-season game of the Northern Tigers AFL in the glorious sunshine last week, I was asked if I could journey out into the middle for a couple of quarters as the main umpire had to leave at half-time. I was in shorts and thongs, so I made the split-second decision to do the job in bare feet.
At the end of the 40-odd minutes out in the middle, my feet were black and I had to go home and pick at least 15 bindis out of them. What made it worse was that I’d forgotten that I had a pair of runners in my car!
This led me to think of other split-second decisions that have impacted people’s lives. Not like the major ones, but ones that you can look back and wonder ‘What if?’
A family friend of ours many years ago used his kids’ ages (not their birth-dates) as his lucky numbers in lotto. These were the days when you had to go into the store or newsagent and buy the ticket. He didn’t have time to change his usual ticket despite two of his kids having a birthday that week, so he used his old numbers. If he’d changed the numbers they would have won second division. Not life-changing, but an overseas holiday is nicer than going to a local caravan park.
On the last day of our honeymoon at a Fijian resort (in 1992), word had got around that American superstar actor Woody Harrelson had just arrived. The new bride was a massive fan so I asked Woody if he’d be in a photo with my wife. He was a ripper of a bloke and agreed. Shirtless, tanned and with a glorious six-pack, Woody posed for a few snaps, then he put his hand around my bride. I said the deal didn’t include touching. He took his arm off my wife only for her to call ‘bulldust!’ and grab his hand and put it straight back. After this, he suggested I get in the photo with them. In a split-second, I decided I was not going to go topless besides this hunk of a man so I grabbed my T-shirt. After a few snaps we said our thanks and goodbyes. It was then I realised that, in my haste to put my shirt on, I’d put it on inside-out and back to front. Woody probably thought, like many others over the years: ‘How did this bloke get that beautiful woman when he can’t even put his shirt on properly?’
Many years ago, I was looking through the Trading Post (a paper version of Gumtree) for a new set of golf clubs. A bloke was selling a new set that he’d won in a promotion. He didn’t play golf and just wanted some cash for them. I went to his house, which turned out to be a house that he’d beat me in an auction to buy. After some pleasantries I paid for the clubs and went home.
Going through my new golf bag I realised it had two dozen balls, head covers, and a putter! About $400 worth, but the chap hadn’t realised. I was telling the bride when she asked if I’d stopped at the bloke’s house on my way home or had gone home, changed out of my work gear and then gone to his house. I said the latter. She informed me that my track suit was inside out and a tag as big as your hand was basically sticking out of my backside. I’d been laughing at him for not realising how much the golf gear was worth, and he was probably laughing at me, thinking he was never going to lose an auction to a bloke who can’t put his pants on properly. Another bad split-second decision.
Coming back from gym class the other week the darling wife had dinner on the table. Feeling a bit parched from my workout, I grabbed a half-full can of Coke on the bench. A split-second decision to drink it proved to be another downfall. After the second mouthful I began to cough and spit the drink out because it wasn’t Coke, it was still-warm surplus cooking oil she’d made dinner with.
But my favourite one is when listening to Marty Haynes on breakfast radio, he had a caller who said for his 21st in Perth back in the early ’70s his dad said he could have a live band. He sourced two local bands: one was $20 and the other was $25. In a split-second decision it was decided to go with the cheaper band and spend the $5 leftover on beer. The $25 band turned out to be AC/DC.
I know these days it is all rush, rush, rush, but maybe take a tad more than a split-second to make some choices!
